Thy Shall Not Compare

  Do you sometimes compare yourself to others? 

Why is it our first response? To compare, when we see how someone else’s life is going...we immediately will compare it to our own. Sure we’ll give a thunderous congratulations, well done girl you finally did it, you deserve it. 

Then we begin comparing, even if it’s only within our own mental space. Which most of us won’t admit. I know I’ve been guilty of it myself to be honest. Why is that? What in us makes us feel like there’s always a competition going on between us and other women? Does this cause some of the unspoken issues that women have with each other?  Are we just that damn shallow, always inserting ourselves into the equation.

Comparison I believe has been the culprit that caused the deaths of many friendships. It’s not a Neka-ism I think it’s a human-ism. Our parents compare the obedient sibling to the black sheep to prove that his or her parenting skills wasn’t a complete failure there’s one astute child to prove that fact.

Let’s not forget to mention how society is constantly comparing African American women to white from there body types to their intellect. Or how we compare our ex to our current, or our next! I think you get the point, right?


Let me say this not all comparison is negative though. There are some circumstances in which comparison can be a great thing. Only when used to compare how far you’ve come from last year, the risk you’re finally willing to take for love that you dare not try two years ago. Or those squats are paying off finally compared to two months ago! See comparison can be good even if it’s self serving. LOL

So let’s use the tool of comparison to measure how far we’ve come. The tremendous strides we’re making now in pursuit of purpose. Because if the truth be told no one compares to you Sis! I am having to learn how not to compare myself still, it’s a conscious effort daily.

I don’t always get it right either, sometimes it punches me right in the pit of my stomach. Others it rolls off my back like water on a duck’s back. My mom used to say that, yup I quote my mom from time to time. 

Hear me when I say, (even though you’re reading and not listening) just go with me on this...You are truly a masterpiece, the mold was destroyed after you were created. No need to compare or compete, you’re in a league all your own.

Big facts!!

Let me leave you with this to meditate on...for every minute you spend comparing yourself to others you lose 60 seconds of your life.




1 comment

  • This was helpful!!!!!!! A BIG pill to swallow, but the TRUTH will make you FREE!!! Well written!

    Annetta Swift

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